Child Custody Forms
Child Custody Forms Will Change Your Life
You are about to file child custody forms and you can sense that life as you know is going to change. Some rather heavy, painful events have already taken place which led to the need to seek out these forms, but what you may not be anticipating is the effects of actually going through with filing for custody of your children. Unless you have an agreement already reached with the other parent, things are going to be considerably different once these forms have been served and registered through the courts.
The Surprise Filing
The worst situations occur when you are backed into a corner and have to file for child custody without the other parent expecting it. If you can avoid this situation it is best, so don’t do it out of spite. Make sure to give some advance warning so they have time to absorb what is going to happen and prepare themselves. This may seem like giving them an advantage of knowing ahead of time, but you will lessen the drama which will lessen the impact on your children.
Also make certain not to serve papers on the other parent when the children are with them. This puts your children in a bad situation of watching a possible emotional meltdown of the other parent or a screaming match between the two of you. Even if the heat is transferred over the phone the children will hear it and they will be affected by it.
You want to be able to hold your head high and feel proud of yourself at the end of the day. Do not get caught up in the intense emotions and do or say things that will reflect negatively on you after filing child custody forms. Remember, these things can be brought up against you as reasons you are an unfit parent so maintain your dignity at all times.
A good way to handle this is to imagine your children are always listening and watching (because they actually are!). Don’t do or say anything that you would not want them to hear or see. Role modeling is important even in a time of crisis and intense emotion.
Cut Yourself Some Slack
After saying all of that, it’s important to note that you will never be perfect. You will make mistakes. Your tongue will slip. Anger will get the best of your from time to time. Cut yourself some slack as long as you are making a conscious effort to handle this in the best way possible.
Keeping Your Mind Straight
Child custody is all about the child, though most parents tend to turn it into something that is all about them. You are going through more pain than you have ever experienced in your life and are fearful of losing your children or only seeing them sporadically. That is understandable, but what your children are going through always trumps your own pain.
You have to figure out a way to put your own emotions and feelings aside and honestly assess what is best for your children. If you can both do that, then an agreement will easily be reached and child custody forms can be agreed upon and filed peacefully.